Those Leaves Are Not Going To Pickup Themselves!


Here on the East Coast (D.C. area) most of the leaves have dropped off of the trees and all of them seem to prefer my yard. Once again I will be the last person in the “Hood” to pick up my leaves. The guy across the street has been in his yard every weekend waiting with rake in hand to get the little buggers as they fall off of the trees.

I can’t stand it, when I’m asked by others who know of my hatred, have I cleaned my yard yet?, I usually go into a glassy stare (so I’m told) and mumble something about “If God had wanted man to pick up leaves you would think he might have mentioned it by now, so why mess with the natural order of things”

So each year, I have to make a decision about how to get up my leaves while not actually picking them up.

My next house, if I ever pay this one off, will be located either on a parking lot, or the Bonneville Salt Flats!

This year, the pressure is not as great because the guy on the right of me is a renter so I know those leaves will be here next spring! Last year I had the little brown bombers removed by a landscaping service. I really did not have the money so I considered selling pints of blood or a body part or two, but at the last minute the company came up with a payment plan for me. Good thing because I was not thinking about selling my body parts, I was leaning toward my 16 year old daughter’s instead. Starting with the “Smart Tongue” she seems to stick out at me a lot of late.

This year, I will opt for the same I guess, I wonder what I can get for a leaf” Smart Mouth” this time around.


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